HOW I ALMOST LOST MY VIRGINITY


I am the most sensible, married, church lady you can imagine.  That is now, but I wasn't always this sane.  

Actually I come from a family of crazy people. I don't mean crazy like most kids think of their parents, I mean absolutely certifiable insane.  Maybe not nut house severe, but definitely need to take their meds insane.  Mom wasn't, but she was an enabler.  She couldn't stand up to my, often off the wall, father.

At fourteen I didn't understand what I know now.  At that age I just thought all adults were mad, and hated me personally.  I loved school, just to get away from my family.  I was a gifted student or so the teachers all thought.  I took refuge in books, that was my gift, not a superior intellect.

So when the summer before I entered high school came around, I was miserable within a week.  I was home all day with my two crazy brothers and my mousie mom.  In the evening it was religious babble from my delusional father.  He managed to function only because he was a true genius.  One of those people who, even in the early days, understood the computer's logic.  

One of his co workers asked, " Hal, I would your daughter be interested in being the summer nanny to our small children.  Betty has to teach summer school and we already sent the regular nanny home to Holland."

 When dad told me, I jumped at the chance.  I would have done it free, just to escape my family.  Mr Roberts had offered to pay me two hundred dollars a week.  It know now that it was a pittance, but I didn't care at the time.  I just wanted to be away from home for those precious hours.

I went to his house after church for an interview.    I was on my best behavior.

"So Jennifer, do you like children?"  It was Mrs Roberts who asked.

"Yes I love children and they respond to me.  I have been baby sitting since I was twelve."

"So you can fix their lunch as well as generally keep them occupied?"  That was Mr. Roberts.  He looked as though he asked just to look interested.

"Yes, if it's not going to be more than open a can of something and heat it.  I can make a wicked peanut butter and jelly sandwich."

"Well that should do nicely.  I will make sure everything is ready for you and simple.  Just try to keep the amount of junk food to a minimum."

"Yes ma'am." I said agreeing to anything at all.

The two children were young enough to require a lot of attention.  It made the days pass quickly, and I fell  madly in love with both of them.  The parents seemed normal, something I was definitely not used to seeing.  They attended our church but, unlike my parents, neither was fanatical.  All in all the first two weeks were wonderful.

On Sunday night, at the beginning of my third week, Daddy went nuts about me talking to a boy after church.  He ranted and raved and confine me to the house after my nanny day ended.  It wasn't really a big deal since I seldom went anywhere.  It was just humiliating to be treated so badly.  I didn't know exactly what was so wrong, since every one of my friends did much worse.

On Monday I was upset all day but fought back the tears.  Mr. & Mrs. Roberts arrived home at four.  Mr. Roberts and I were in the car when I began to sob at the thought of going home.  

"Jen, what in the world is wrong.  Aren't you happy working for Beth and I?"

"God it isn't that.  I just don't want to go home.  My dad and I are fighting."

"I know your dad can be hard to get along with Jenny, but he really isn't a bad man.  He is just a little different from most folks."

"He is making me as crazy as he is."  I blurted it out with tears streaming down my face.  Mr. Roberts pulled the car into a vacant service station parking lot, then awkwardly put his arm around me.

"There, there Jenny.  You need to compose yourself before you get home.  Your dad will think that we have done something to make you cry.  He won't let you come back to be our nanny."

"Oh no, he can't do that.  I will go crazy if I have to stay there all the time."

"Then dry those tears."  He was speaking kindly, but it was very much an order.

"Yes sir, I will try."  I choked and wiped my face.  He still had an arm around me awkwardly.  I loved the feeling of warmth from him.

I managed to get through the evening without upsetting my dad.  One day of the crazies, then things calmed down at home.  It stayed calm at home for two more days.  During that time Mr. Roberts kept his distance, but did give me a few furtive glances I suppose.

On the drive home he asked, "So are things better at home."

"Yes, being away helps a lot.  Now that school is out I was worried.  But working for you is my salvation.  I want to thank you for being so kind to me."

Of course things at home didn't stay better.  I suppose he knew what would happen.  He arrived home before his wife most days.   Since it usually was only a few minutes, not even my crazy father considered it a problem.  He noticed when things went down hill a few days later.  I was noticeably depressed.

"So you okay?" Mr Roberts asked in the family room.  There were kids everywhere so there was no question that it was harmless.

"I'm okay."

"No you aren't.  What is it this time?"

"Just the same madness.  I don't want to burden you."

"Well, could you use a hug?"

"Yes."  My eyes were on the floor.  I have to admit even now that the feeling of a grown man holding me was a very powerful feeling.  I know it was because my only adult male role model was crazy as a bedbug.  Still, Mr. Roberts gave wonderful hugs.  He even ran his hand over my back while he held me close.  It was sort sexual to a teenaged girl.  Not overtly, but still it was there.  He did it even with the kids watching.  He moved on to hug them as well.

"You can have a hug anytime you want.  All you have to do is ask, but you do have to ask."  He said it softly almost seductively.  It made me shiver.

Somehow it seemed okay to ask for a hug when things didn't go just right.  I instinctively knew not to ask in front of his wife.  It was our little secret and I knew it without being told.  I don't think that I believed he was doing anything wrong.  I probably I felt that I was.   At the time I thought that he saw it as harmless, and that I was making too much of it.  Still it was a new feeling for me.

A few days later I wasn't really having a bad day at all but I asked, "Mr. Roberts could I have a hug please?"

"Why of course my dear," he replied.  He took me into his arms and held me.  I could feel his hot breath in my ear.  His hands ran up and down my back.  I couldn't help it I pressed my hips against him.  He responded by dropping his hand lower.  He massaged my buttocks as he hugged me.

From out of no where he kissed me.  It was gentle almost a familiar family type kiss, but there was also a background of heat in it.  It was as if his kiss was tentative waiting to see if and how I would respond.  It took me just a second to decide.  I opened my mouth and let his tongue inside.  I knew what french kissing was.  I had read and heard other girls discussing it, so I wasn't even surprised.  I was a little surprised by what it did to me.  I became very weak and I felt a heat spread over my body.

He broke the kiss then spoke.  "Now do you feel better."

I managed to stammer out, "Yes thank you."  I felt different and it surely wasn't a depression of any kind.  What it was, I later recognized was very, very turned on.  It was my first erotic moment with a man.  Later when looking back, I realized it was very close to an orgasmic moment.

I went home in a 'feet hardly touching the ground' state.  I sailed through dinner without paying the least attention to my dads rants.  I was able to smile rather than cringe.  It was a totally new experience for me.  One which I silently thanked Mr. Roberts for giving me.

When Mr Roberts arrived home the next day it must have seemed as though I was waiting in ambush.  The kids were in the yard playing when I asked, "Mr Roberts sir would you kiss me again please."

When he kissed me I had  a similar feeling, but not quite so strong a rush.  It still got me through an evening with my family.  I had no more than a moments discomfort that night.  I was a little disconcerted by having to asked to be kissed, but I didn't object.  Certainly not enough to forego that afternoon kiss.  From that day on I made sure the children were occupied for several minutes before Mrs. Roberts arrived home.

As any reasonable person would assume the kissing moved forward after a week.  While kissing me, Mr. Roberts had always run his hands over my back.  He began running them over my buttocks.  Then he separated my cheeks as much as possible through my slacks.  It would have been impossible with jeans, but my father forbid me wearing jeans for some reason.

I had always pressed my hips to him when he kissed me.  I knew instinctively that he enjoyed it.  I also enjoyed the feeling of what I did to him.  Yes, I knew even then about male erections.  I gave him an erection and I enjoyed the power that I felt.  I could turn on an older man.  That was some heady stuff for a 14 year old virgin.  Yes I should have known better, but who was there to tell me.

It was sometime during that second week, after we kissed, that he stepped back.  "Turn around," he said.  I did as I was told.  He hugged me, then pulled me back to him.  He unbuttoned the top two buttons of my cotton blouse.  His hand slipped inside my blouse, then inside my soft bra.  When his fingers touched my nipples, I gasped.  My knees buckled so badly, that Mr. Roberts had to support me.  I could feel his erection pressing hard against my rear.  All of it made me gasp.  

He rubbed and squeezed and pinched my nipples for what seemed like hours.  I knew it could really have been only minutes.  He had me so turned on that I was choking with desire.  I wasn't sure what it was for but it was definitely for something.  Suddenly he stopped touching my nipples.  He removed his hands from inside my blouse.  He whispered into my ear.  "Did you like that?"

I nodded.  "You have to answer me Jen Jen."

"Yes," I manage to choke out.

"Good, you can have it any time you ask."  With that he stepped back, turned walked into his home office.  His wife arrived shortly after.  She was the one who drove me home that night.

"Jen I want you to know that my kids love you.  I wish you didn't have to go back to school in the fall.  They absolutely adore you."

I felt so guilty that I almost told her about me and her husband, but I fought off the urge.

"Thank you. I love working for you and your husband.  I just love your children."

"Good, I would hate to lose you.  If you ever think about leaving, please come to me first.  I will do most anything to keep you with the children."  I didn't know what to make of it, so I just let it go.

Things were better at home than they ever had been.  Somehow what I did with Mr. Roberts made it easier to cope with my father and two brothers.   Honestly all of them were quite mad.

I had the weekends off and hated every minute of them.  Being around my family, even half of Saturday, was miserable.  All day Sunday was almost more than I could stand.

"We are going to the cabin this weekend kids."  The groan wasn't just from me.  All of us hated a weekend at the cabin.  Dad might go fanatic or just frantic at any moment.  It was almost guaranteed to happen.

I was badly depressed on Friday.  Mr. Roberts had become able to read my moods.  "So, what the problem Jen Jen?" he asked.

"I have to spend the weekend with my family at the cabin.  I won't be able to get away for a moment."

"And so what do you need?"

"I need you to touch me?"

"Ah touch you where?"

"I need you to hold me and play with my nipples."

"Then come here sweetie."  I actually moaned as I walked to him.  I kissed him then turned my back.  It was to give him free access to my breasts.  He opened the two buttons and began to play with my nipples.  He was a lot rougher than he had ever been before.  It hurt, but I didn't mind.  I had the terrible weekend on my mind and anything was better than thinking about that.

I was lost in it when I felt him open the snap on my slacks.  I might have resisted on a regular day, but not that Friday.  I felt his hand slide under the waist band of my panties and then over my pubic hair.  His thick finger slipped into the valley over my clit.  He found my clit and then moved on to slip his finger just inside me.  His finger was slippery and wet when he returned to make little circles with my clit.

I began to cry and orgasm at the same time.  It was almost immediately that I began, but he didn't stop his manipulating.  He continued until I was on the verge of fainting.  He somehow knew that he had pushed me as far as possible.

It wasn't my first orgasm, but it was my first multiple orgasm.  I  had masturbated a few times but never felt anything like that.  I was clinging to him when he stepped back.  "You need to get yourself together Jen."  He pushed me toward the bathroom.  I washed my face combed my hair and then went back outside to await his wife.

"Jen, are you coming down with a cold?"  Mrs. Roberts sounded concerned.  I'm sure it was more for her kids health than my own.

"No ma'am."

"Well your face is flushed.  I think you should take an aspirin and go right to bed when you get home.  Rest as much as you can this weekend."  I nodded.

"Don't you dare rest Jen.  You do to yourself what I did to you.  Do it at least once over the weekend."

"I won't be able to, they will be around all the time," I replied.

"I don't care, do it and think of me.  Whisper my name like you did today."

"Did I do that?"

"Yes, but it was a moan.  That's what you need to do, but make sure no one hears."  He said it softly and with a knowing smile.  As I left the car he gave my thigh a squeeze.  I smiled.

My dad wanted to leave in the middle of the night.  It was so that he and my brothers could get onto the lake at daylight.  Mom and I tried to chat, but it just wasn't possible.  She had let my father browbeat me too often for me to have any daughterly feelings for her.

The men came in for a late lunch.  My brother Thomas didn't want to go out back to the lake afterward.  Daddy was angry, but couldn't force Thomas to go sit it the boat again.  Mom sat on the porch reading her bible, while I slipped into the cabin's only real bedroom for a nap.  I was in a twilight state when Thomas came into the room.  I opened my eyes enough to see him.  I actually was more asleep than not, when he laid down beside me.

It wasn't an unusual thing for him to do, since we often slept in the same bed at the cabin.  I wasn't at all concerned.  I don't expect my mother would have been either.  She didn't know about my sexual awakening.  I didn't plan to bring it to my family's attention either.

Thomas must have been having similar things going on as well.  He wasn't in the bed more than a moment when he turned toward me.  I was pretending to be asleep, but I was also very aware of his body pressed against me.  He wasn't really on me, just snuggled up to me.  I debated what to do.  I didn't think he meant any harm, at least not until his hand fell onto my thigh.  I fought the urge to gasp.  Not from his hand, but from the memories it stirred in me.

I waited just a couple of seconds then decided to continue pretending to be asleep.  I rolled away from him.  My back was to him when I felt him move away.   I thought I was safe, but he rolled against me again.  The position I found myself in was almost the same as with Mr. Roberts.  My back was toward him and his body pressed against me.  

Yes I could feel my brother's erection.  It was frightening, but also kind of arousing.  Not that it was my brother.  I never gave that a thought, it was more the feeling of an erect penis pressed against me yet again.  I almost lost myself in it, but I fought for control.  In the end I rolled onto to stomach.  I thing Thomas either figured out I was in a twilight sleep and not interested, or I was going to lose my cool and start to scream.   Something happened because he rolled to the opposite edge of the bed.

The weekend passed as I knew it would.  My father was acting off the wall by dark.  I had no where to get away from him, so I took a walk down to the lake.  Once there I leaned against a tree, put my hand inside my slacks and then masturbated.  I kept on past the orgasm I wanted.  I did it until I was almost unconscious.

I went back to the cabin after half an hour.  Daddy was still ranting, but I just ignored him.  I slipped off to sleep early.  That night I slept on one of the sofas.  Thomas slept on the second one and Eddie my older brother slept on the floor.  It wasn't as bad as it sounds.  Eddie had a foam mattress that was kept under the only bed in the cabin.

The two sofas were arranged so that my head was perpendicular to Thomas's head.  He wanted to whisper, but I wanted to sleep.  I drifted off while he was telling me some bull story about a girl at school.  I sure as hell didn't intend to tell him about Mr. Roberts.

I could barely contain myself on Monday.  I looked forward to Mr. Roberts arriving home from work.  When he finally entered the house, I almost attacked him.

"Please I need you," I said standing close to him.

"What do you need?"

"I need you to touch me."

"Where do you need me to touch you."

"I need you to touch me down there."  I was looking at the floor.

"You mean you need me to touch your pussy?"

"Yes that," I replied.

"Then say it.  We don't have any secrets from each other."

"Yes, I need you to touch my pussy."

"Do you want me to finger fuck you?"  I was shocked but I also gasped.   I swallowed hard before I could speak even in a whisper.

"Yes, I want you to do that."

"Say it Jen."

"I want you to finger fuck me."  I could hear the whiny tone in my voice.  I was almost mores ashamed of the voice than what I said.

"I want you to touch me as well," he said.  He guided my hand to his penis as he slipped his hand into my slacks.  Of course, it was the first time I had ever touched a man's penis even through his pants.  I held it while he fingered me to an hard orgasm.  It was a single one because I heard the children at the locked patio door.  I looked at his pants before I went to the door.  There was one small wet spot.  I knew he hadn't cum but I had at least cause some reaction.

The kids came in and shortly there after Mrs. Roberts arrived.  That night she drove me home.  She began telling me about her summer school class and how troubled the kids were.  She was always glad to get back to her normal life after a day with them.  I thought how strange that she was leaving a troubled world to go home, and I was leaving her home to go to a troubled world.  It just seemed somehow ironic.

My dad was especially nuts that night.  He even managed to get through my good mood at having felt Mr. Roberts's penis.  Daddy had me in tears.  He was fussing about girls my age who dated boys.  According to him girls my age were helpless and could be talked into anything by boys.  He seemed to know what I was doing.  I knew there was no way that he could know, but he still seemed to be talking about me.  I cried myself to sleep that night, but only after I masturbated thinking about how Mr. Roberts's penis had felt.

The next afternoon Mr. Roberts came home half an hour earlier than usual.  The kids went out to play willingly.  Since the yard was fenced it was safe to half way ignore them a bit.  The patio door had a one way film on it.  The kids couldn't see us but I could look out and keep an eye on them.  It was one of the few times I could get my mind off what was happening to me.  I went to Mr. Roberts willingly.  I even asked him to finger fuck me.  Yes I used those words without being prompted  

"I will, but only if you will jack my cock."  I knew what he meant, but not how to do it.  He wrapped my hand around his cock, then covered it with his own.  He moved my hand up and down his hard cock in long slow strokes.  He made sure that I went over the head to get my hand slippery.  

After I was doing it the way he wanted, he took his hand and slipped it inside my slacks.  Under my panties and then over my pubic hair.  He moved his finger in and out of my pussy.  Yes, I was beginning to think like he wanted me to. I could feel it in my soul as well as my body.

It didn't take long before I was bouncing up and down.  I was clutching his finger with the muscles inside my pussy.  Grasping his finger trying to pull it in deeper.  He suddenly stopped moving his finger inside me and just got real stiff.  The thick white fluid first spurted then dripped from his cock.  I had it all over my hand.

"Lick it," he said.  I was a little surprised until I saw his eyes shining.  He was lost in the moment just like me.  I wanted to please him but.

"It will make me sick,"  I didn't say it without a lot of conviction.

"No, you will like it I promise."   I tentatively licked my finger.  It didn't have any taste at all.  It was just a feeling really.  It felt warm and thick.  It seemed to coat my lips and tongue.  He watched me closely as I licked.

"Now lick my cock clean."  I instinctively knew that it was wrong.  I didn't know why, but I felt it was something I shouldn't do.  I shook my head no.

"Do it Jen Jen and do it now."  There was no room for me to slip out.  I had to either do it or disobey him.  I chose to do it.  I moved over to kneel between his legs.  I licked his cock slowly and carefully until I had licked it all.  I expected him to say, it felt good or something.  Instead he said, "Go clean up, Betty will be here any minute."  

I had come so hard and long that I forgot all about the other.  I was just worn out and satisfied beyond belief.  Daddy was even nice to me when I got home.  He was only slightly depressed so he wasn't snapping at me.  My brothers left the house early and I was glad to see them go.  I pretty much had the upstairs to myself with them gone.  I was able to take a leisurely bath.  I could soak and masturbate slowly and let it build.  

I relived the taste of Mr. Roberts cum and the feel of his cock on my tongue.  I was deep in his memory when I came with a whimper.  It was amazing that I could see Mr. Roberts's face so clearly when I came.  I looked up to see Thomas standing in the doorway.  He was ginning like an idiot.

"So you got a thing for Mr. Roberts."

"Get out of here.  I'm taking a bath."

"I can see that you are.  I can also see what you were doing."

"So do you think daddy will be more angry that I was masturbating, or that you were watching."

"Most likely both, but I'm used to him raising the devil.  It bothers you not me."  Thomas seemed to think he held the cards.

"Get out Thomas."  I waited when he didn't I added.  "Please Thomas I need to get out of this tub."

"Then get out."

"I am not going to get out of here naked with you watching."

"Sure you are.  If I tell Daddy what you were doing, your days at the Roberts house are over."

"It's just a fantasy."

"Daddy won't care, you know that."

"He is going to care that you are trying to blackmail me."

"Yep, but like I said, I can take it.  I don't think you can."

"What do you want?"

"First I want you to get out of that tub."  He had a devilish smile.  I hated him and I hated to do anything for him, but I didn't want daddy to have any reason to stop me from going to visit Mr. Roberts.  I got up from the tub slowly with my back turned to him.  

"Oh no turn around sis."  I turned slowly.

"Well your tits aren't very big.  Does Mr. Roberts like them."  I was torn.  I didn't know whether to lie or flaunt it.

"He has never seen them."

"Oh sure.  Don't get dressed just yet."  I stood naked and dripping in front of him.

"So what kinds of things do you do for him?"

"I don't do anything, it's a fantasy."

"Sure it is."  He paused a minute then said, "Sit down."  When I didn't move he said it again.

"Sit down Jen."  I sat down on the toilet. "Now do it again."

"Do what?"  I knew what, I just couldn't believe he would say it.

"Masturbate for me."  His look was pure evil.  I had a desire to spit in his face and walk out.  I also was very sure that he would tell dad.  One more thing bothered me.  I was beginning to feel my heart beat faster.  I couldn't believe it, but I was getting turned on.  It wasn't Thomas, it had to be the situation.  "Do it now Jen."

I spread my legs and began.  I rubbed my clit and then slipped a finger inside.  I found that I was very wet and slippery.  Moving back to my clit, I found it very easy to move around.  I had kept my eyes closed up till the point where I was squirming.  I opened them to see Thomas with his cock out.  He was stroking it as I had done for Mr. Roberts.  I could tell when he got stiff that he was ready to cum.  I hurried up my movement so that I could cum as well.  It wasn't as good as when I came on Mr. Roberts fingers but it was still pleasant.  Just before I came I felt something hot and thick hit my breast.  Thomas had shot his cum onto my breast.

I looked up at him defiantly.  "Now get out."  I said it with conviction.  He left.  I made sure that he wasn't coming back before I collected  his semen with my fingers.  I licked them clean several times before I had it all.  

Later in bed I realized that I was going to have to do something about Thomas.  I had no intention of doing that again.  It had been exciting in that truly 'Nasty' kind of way.  Still that wasn't going to be happening again.

The next day I told Mr. Roberts and he went absolutely crazy.  Not with anger but with lust.  I didn't have to ask for anything.  He was all over me, doing not just the thing I asked for but everything he had done previously.  He kissed me deep, massaged my back, played with my nipples.  Then he fingered me till I had the best orgasm I had ever had.  I thought they all were the best, but that one was hands down the best thing I had ever felt.  

"Now that you have come, suck my cock," he demanded.  I wasn't sure that I could do it at all.  I knew for a fact that I would be terrible at it.  He didn't care and he wouldn't take no for an answer.  He covered my nose until I opened my mouth to breath and/or complain.  At that point he forced his cock into my mouth.

"Now suck it.  No not like that.  Suck and move you head back and forth like you do your hand.  That's right stroke it with your mouth."  He released the pressure and I slipped his cock out of my mouth long enough to beg with tears running down my face.

"Please don't cum in my mouth."  I went back to sucking and he didn't even answer.  I felt so nasty, but I also felt wonderful from having just had the best orgasm of my life.  His smooth hard cock massaged my mouth.  It gagged me now and then but I soon got used to that.  It didn't take long to learn how deep I could take him without that sensation.  I felt him stiffen then drive his cock painfully into my throat three times.

The taste of his cum in my mouth wasn't disgusting, I had tasted it before.  The fact that he hadn't listened to me at all was a little disconcerting.  Nonetheless, I had a mouth full of his cum and didn't know what to do with it.

"Don't lose any of it," he demanded.  His tone had changed.  It wasn't softly demanding anymore it was harsh.  I closed my eyes and swallowed it.  I gagged on his cum but I fought to keep it down.  In the end I had to rush for the bathroom to throw up.  I stayed long enough to 'clean up'.

I was back in the den waiting for his wife to come home.  I had no idea where he was.  He was presumably in his little office with the half bath.  Most likely cleaning himself as I had done.

Just before I left his car to enter my home he said, "Don't try to stop your brother, just go along.  You don't want to have him mention any of this to your father.  Your dad is a nut, there is no telling what he will do if he finds out that you are masturbating and moaning my name."  He paused while I got out of the car.  I passed close to his door as I walked around the car.  "Besides it's erotic as hell."  

I was shocked but I said nothing.  I had a sick feeling then.  I thought he loved me up until that moment.  At that moment, I knew that I was nothing more than a thing to him.  Something for him to play with.  I had no idea what I would do with the information, but I knew what the score was at last.

Home that night was bearable.  It seemed that 'getting off' was the answer to dealing with the crazies of my life.  As long as I had a decent orgasm during the day, I could almost always let the craziness of my family just pass me by in the afterglow.

Thomas didn't bother me that night, but I also stayed away from him.  He would have had to seek me out.  Most likely if he had done that, someone in the house would notice.  Thomas for all his big talk was as terrified of our father as I was.

The next day when Mr. Roberts arrived home I was pacing the floor.  I had spent most of the day remembering his cock in my mouth.  I could relive every feeling associated with that orgasm.   

When he arrived I said, "Please Mr Roberts I want your cock in my mouth and your hand inside my pussy."  His answer was to torture me with sensations until I exploded into a hard muscle clinching orgasm.  After I came I concentrated on his cock.  I sucked his cock till he came in my mouth.  I still ran to the bathroom to throw up,  and he still didn't seem to care.

"You will get used to it," he assured me.  I didn't dare explain that I didn't want to get used to it.

Thomas seemed to be avoiding me, and I was perfectly satisfied with that.  I started my period that night.  I expected that it would stop Mr. Roberts, but of course it didn't.  He still did all the things he did before and I still reacted the same way.  The feel of his cock in my mouth was beginning to start me on the road to another orgasm.  I didn't mention it to him, because it somehow seemed wrong.

I still had to ask to have him touch me.  I wondered what would happen if I didn't ask.  Since I was living for his touch and the orgasms it brought, I didn't attempt to find out.

On Saturday of that week, Thomas was out with a couple of his friends working on an old car he had been given.   He would be driving later that year.  Mom was shopping while dad was at the church doing his help a poor family thing.  My older brother was off playing some sport or other.

Thomas caught me in the upstairs hallway.  He pushed me into the bathroom.  I tried to struggle free but he laughed at me.  "Now Jen, let's see what old man Roberts is teaching you."  With those words he reached for, then lifted the bottom of my sweat shirt.  His hands covered my breasts but over my bra.  I could feel my knees start to quiver.

"So you like that?" Thomas asked.  I have absolutely no idea why I answered except that maybe his tone was similar to Mr. Roberts.

"Yes, but you shouldn't be doing it."

"Why, you let old man Roberts play with your boobs.  Why not me?"

"You are my brother it isn't right."

"It's okay Jen.  I'm not going to screw you.  You can keep whatever Roberts leaves you.  I just want to touch you."

"You can't Thomas you know it's wrong.  Daddy will kill us both."  I don't know for sure but I think his hands on me had sapped my resistance.  I was going through the motions and I really did want him to stop, but I just couldn't seriously try to force him to do it.

"Take off the sweat shirt Jen."

"No I won't."

"Okay, then I will."  He quickly lifted it over my head.  I didn't help but I also didn't resist.  "Take off the bra Jen or I will."

I was in a fog of desire.  Not really for him just to feel that release that freed me from all my anxiety.  I removed the bra for him.

"Still those small boobs," was all he said.  He touched them first.  Pulling and twisting them even more painfully than Mr. Roberts had done.  Then he did something Mr. Roberts had never done, he pulled me to him and took a nipple into his mouth.  As he sucked on my breast, I moaned.

"I knew you would like it."  Thomas went back to sucking on my nipple.  I couldn't help that my body betrayed me.  I was helpless and I knew it.  I just refused to participate.

Thomas pulled my hips to him as he sucked.  I could feel my body respond by pushing into him.  He continued to suck as he slipped his hand between my legs.  He was able to reach my pussy through the leg of my shorts.  I couldn't believe how good it felt for him to be moving his finger in me, while sucking on my breast.  I soaked my panties and his finger as well.  It was a sweet orgasm and yet also strong.

"That's my baby sister.  You cum so nice."  I whined.  "Now you need to help me."  He stepped back expecting me to do something.  I wanted to, but I was also afraid.  "Come on sis, it's only fair, I helped you."

I nodded, then reached for his pants.  I unzipped and reached inside.  I worked his hard cock out and began to stroke it.  He was so excited that my hand was covered with his lubricant almost instantly.  It didn't take long for him to begin pumping at my hand.  Within seconds he came.  I managed to cover the head of his cock, so that it didn't get all over me.  I had at least learned one useful thing from Mr. Roberts.  What it did, was to leave me with was a hand full of hot cum.  It was also dripping onto the tile floor.  I washed my hand in the sink quickly even then I felt guilty that I didn't eat it.  I  had to resist the urge to treat Thomas as I treated Mr, Roberts.

"God Jen that was great.  We are going to have to do this more often."

"No Tommy, that was the last time."

"Oh no sis, there is lots more that we can do.  Don't worry, I won't take your cherry.  I know you have to have that when you get married."  He left the bathroom quickly after those words.

Yes I had to be a virgin when I married, or I would have some serious explaining to do.  In our faith all the girls were brought up to know that sex outside of marriage is dead wrong.  It could cost a girl everything.  It was most likely why I felt so bad, and so good at the same time.  I hadn't really had sex, Mr Roberts was quick to point that out.  What we did wasn't really sex like in the bible.  It was a technicality I knew, but one we could all live with.  Since Tommy knew it as well, it seemed that the technicality was used by everyone.

Mr. Roberts didn't want to be accused of adultery, so he hid behind it.  I wanted to stay a virgin, so I hid behind it.  Thomas wanted to at least feel that he was being honorable.  So everybody hid behind the technicality.  It might have been my last rational thought but I did wonder how far we could all take it.

Mr Roberts did the most remarkable thing that next week.  He managed to take off an afternoon.  Then the children spend the afternoon at the church's day care for stay at home parents.  It left us alone for three hours.  

When he got back to the house, he said, "Go into the bedroom and wait for me."  I did as he said.  I sat on the edge of the bed and waited.  The waiting heightened my anticipation and my sexual desire.  

I started to speak but he hushed me, then he stripped me.  He spread my legs.  I thought for sure I was going to lose my virginity and I didn't care.  Instead he began to kiss and lick me.

It was an amazing sensation that just wouldn't end.  He turned me into a quivering mass of nerve endings as one orgasm after another ripped through me.  It was the most amazing sensation I had ever felt.  It did come with a price.  I was exhausted but he lifted me off the bed.

Now you are going to learn a new trick Jen.  With that he held his cock out to me.  I knew what to do I sucked it into my mouth.  He held my head from behind and began ramming his cock into my throat.  "Relax Jean.  If you do this will be much easier.  Just relax your throat."  I tried but I gagged over and over.  Mr. Roberts didn't seem to notice.

Mr. Roberts had begun to teach me how to take his cock down my throat.  It was hard at first.  I even threw up on the bathroom floor, but he kept after me day after day.  I finally got so that I could take him all the way to his testicles.


While he was doing that Thomas was also working on me.  He was several steps behind Mr. Roberts but was trying to catch up.  I could resist him much more easily.  But he was persistent.

I kept trying to find a way to have Mr. Roberts's mouth on me again, but it didn't seem that it was ever going to work out.  Mr.  Roberts didn't care because my typical work day would end with his cock down my throat, but only after I begged for it.

Thomas had me hot and bothered one night and I was going crazy when I just sat on the toilet and pulled his mouth to me.  He didn't know what to do and certainly wasn't nearly as accomplished as Mr Roberts, but I guided him to it.  I came all over poor Thomas, but I was thinking of Mr. Roberts.

After that I tried to get away with stroking Thomas but he resisted.  He pushed me to my knees and I gave in.  I sucked his cock into my mouth.  It was actually a little larger than Mr. Roberts.  I toyed with the idea of taking all of it but decided not to do that.  I didn't enjoy it, so why bother.  Thomas was more than satisfied with what I gave him.  When he came, I spit it into the sink just for show.  I could easily have swallowed it, but I decided to save that for Mr. Roberts.

Funny how some things were acceptable but others not.  It was just plain strange how I thought in those days.  Mr and Mrs Roberts had a dinner party for a few friends at the end of July.  Mrs Roberts asked if I would keep the kids entertained.  I agreed.  Since the party was going to run late, they got permission from my dad for me to stay over.  I was thrilled.  I didn't know what would happen but I was sure something would.

I fell asleep in the kids room.  It was Mrs. Roberts who came to wake me when she checked on the children.

"Why don't you come sleep in a real bed?" she asked.  At the time I was sleeping on the window seat.  I nodded and followed her.  I was in a sleep induced fog, but I knew that she took me into the master bedroom.  

Mr. Roberts was already in bed with the sheet covering him to the waist.  I could see the tent effect of the sheet stretched over his hard cock.  I looked at his wife standing beside me.

"Marty tells me you like oral sex dear.  Neither he nor I like to do it to each other.  He is good enough at it since I taught him how."  

I allowed her to lead me to the bed.  Mr. Roberts moved over to make room for us.  His wife sat me on the edge of the bed and spread my legs wide.  She lowered herself to the floor in front of me.  She licked and sucked at my clit until I was absolutely crazy with desire.  I was drooling from the feelings she forced on me.  I was about to go mad because she stopped every time I got close to orgasm.

I was begging her when Mr. Roberts slipped from the bed and stood beside his wife.  He placed his hands on my head then pulled me to him.  I was so far into the sex thing that I sucked him deep into my throat even though I thought I would choke.  When I came, it was with his cock deep in my throat.  I came so violently that I know I hurt Mrs. Roberts who had her face against me and her tongue inside me.  

Mr Roberts came in my mouth and I choked on his semen.  I was crazy with lust but also felt that I was dying.  I was so into a sexually induced fog that I didn't even notice Mr Roberts pull me from the bed.  My seat was taken by his wife.  Mr Roberts placed me between her knees then whispered instructions to me.  I licked and sucked at her as she had done me. She pushed me away as she came close to an orgasm only to pull me back to her when the urgency passed.  I have no idea how long I was on my knees for her.  I totally lost track of time.  Finally she came all over my face.  I was soaked and sticky with cum.  Maybe it was a mixture of his and hers, I don't even know.

"Go clean yourself.  The guest room is down the hall."  I washed in their bathroom.  When I finished as I passed through the room, I noted that she was on her knees and he had his cock buried inside her.  He motioned me over but I shook my head, then walked away.

Mrs Roberts drove me home the next morning after breakfast with the kids.  "There will be a bonus in your check this week.  A little extra for our whore."  She sat looking out with a cold stare until I left the car.  She had used me shamelessly but was angry for some reason.  She had been angry since it happened.  Possibly because I had been giving her husband what she wouldn't.  I guess she had the right, but if that was the problem why had she done oral for me.  It made no sense.

Thomas was waiting in the house for me.   Everyone else was gone shopping at the mall.  I tried to avoid him but it was no use.  He pushed me against the kitchen wall and began to kiss me.  It didn't take long until I was lost in it all.  Pretty soon I was naked and he was licking me.  I was so lost I missed the feeling of his fingers inside me.  I was so hot that I came all over his hands before I realized that he was fingering me while he ate me.

"God Jen you are such a good lover."

"I think I am a whore," I replied.

"So what?"

"I'm not sure I like the feeling."

"Jen you have to have actually had real sex to be a whore.  It's a rule I think.  And you haven't have you?"

"No not the real thing."

"Then you can't be a whore."

"Are you sure?"