WHO HAS (or is) THE BEST ASS IN HOLLYWOOD?

Once upon a time in a movie capital far, far away from reality.... Yeah, sure! That's how they spin it, of course, but the reality is a lot more sordid. At a Hollywood party late one night - or more precisely, early one morning - a couple of "buzzed" starlets stripped down and had the guests judge their butts to determine whose was superior. Unhappy with the outcome, one of them - who is lost to history - decided to settle the matter the "old fashioned" way - with her fists, elbows and knees.
When the dust cleared, one proud young woman sat happily smiling as she brushed the hair from her eyes and wiggled her bare bottom happily on the tear-streaked face of the disappointed loser who was made to admit, "OK, you've got the best ass in Hollywood!" In the following years, formal and informal contests were held to determine the possessor of the "Best Ass" or "Best Butt" or even the "Top Bottom" in tinseltown!
The stories that follow are only a few of the hundreds that have been passed down over the decades these contests have been held. As always, we completely and totally vouch for the truthfulness and veracity of the author so you can read them secure in the knowledge each and every word is gospel....or not!